Do You Lead like a Thermometer or a Thermostat?

Do You Lead like a Thermometer or a Thermostat?

by | Leadership

Do You Lead like a Thermometer or a Thermostat?

Photo by Dan Lefebvre

Would you agree that leaders are responsible for creating the right environment? Sometimes, though, leaders do the opposite. 

I recently participated in a week-long leadership training workshop that was actually really good and we didn’t even have to do any of those cheesy trust exercises. 

One exercise I enjoyed was writing our personal leadership vision statements.  This is a short description of our core values, expectations, and things we value that we want to communicate to our teams.

To prepare, we each wrote some ideas based on the things we learned in class and then discussed them in small groups. 

Then at the end of the week, we’d each give a short speech describing our leadership vision statements to the group as if speaking to our actual employees.

One of the participants in my group said his vision statement would include requiring loyalty from his subordinates since this was his core value. I agreed that loyalty is important especially when leading a team.

But I disagreed on we how to get it. 

I’ve learned you can’t force your way to receiving someone’s loyalty. And you can’t buy it either.

After a lengthy discussion, one of the things our group agreed on was that to get loyalty you have to show it first. But this doesn’t just apply to loyalty.

This applies to all those positive traits we want to see in others.

Think of it this way:

A thermometer shows us the temperature, right? But a thermostat regulates the temperature so when a room gets too hot or too cold it brings it back to level you had pre-set.

Leadership works the same way.

The traits we went to see in the people we work with (or even live with) like loyalty, commitment, integrity, honesty, etc are all things we have to show first. You can’t just demand it, or manipulate your way into having it.

It won’t work in the long-term.

It’s the leader’s responsibility to decide what the temperature will be in that environment. That’s what leaders do.

We initiate.

If the leader doesn’t show these positive traits then it’s unlikely others will do it voluntarily. Like John Maxwell says,

“Everything rises and falls with leadership.”

Does this mean that people will always respond how we want? No way. There’s no predicting or controlling how people will react.

However, as leaders we are responsible for being the catalysts. Leaders are responsible for initiating and modeling the behavior they want to see in others.  

Leaders are the thermostats in the room. 

If you want to be respected, show respect. 

If you want loyalty, be loyal first.

If you want honesty, be honest.

If you want the people around you to have integrity then become a person of integrity.

Waiting for others to act first won’t get you very far.

 So, is your leadership style more of a thermometer or a thermostat?

 

 

Are You Reacting Or Responding To Life?

Are You Reacting Or Responding To Life?

by | Leadership

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I was having small argument with my seven year-old daughter recently because she didn’t want to do her homework. Some of you parents can relate to this, right? Well after some back-and-forth she finally said,

“Why do I have to?”

My head was about to explode when she said this, but I didn’t let it show. Fortunately, I stayed calm and I thought about her comment for a few seconds before responding. (By the way I’m not always this cool under pressure…)

Then I remembered three words —You Get To— which I read about in Joel Osteen’s book “Everyday A Friday” (I love this book!).

And I said to her,

“You don’t have to do anything, honey. You get to do it.”

I told her that from that day forward I wanted her to replace “Do I have to” with “I get to.”  I explained to her why she should do this and she seemed convinced, so I think she understood. But even if she didn’t, I’d like to think I planted a “positive-attitude seedling.”

But this is also a reminder for us adults too, so here’s my thinking on this…

 Sometimes life’s frustrations cloud our judgment and we address unwanted or uncomfortable situations by reacting instead of responding. Did you know there’s a difference between the two?  Reacting happens involuntarily like when we take medicine. But responding happens when we reflect before taking action.

I like what psychologist Victor Frankl said about this topic,

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” Occasionally we need a reminder that help us slow down and get in the right mindset.”

Speaking on this topic, my favorite person, Zig Ziglar said,

 

“It’s not the situation, but whether we react negative or respond positive to the situation that is important.”

And just like my daughter, whenever we have that “do I have to…” attitude think about the situation from this perspective:

  • You don’t have to go to work.
  • You don’t have to clean the dishes.
  • You don’t have to exercise.
  • You don’t have to wake up early to work on your side-business (anyone else here with me?).
  • You don’t have love your spouse unconditionally.

YOU GET TO! 

  • You get to go to work.
  • You get to clean the dishes.
  • You get to exercise.
  • You get to wake up early to work on your side-business.
  • You get love your spouse unconditionally.

These are all things you get to do– if you’re lucky enough.

Try it next time. Just change your thinking to  “I get to…” and watch your attitude shift. If it doesn’t work, I’ll give you a full refund with no questions asked! But seriously, though, everyday I’m convinced that our attitude is more important than our circumstances.  How can you start responding instead of reacting to life?